19 – Cultural Islam and Love in the Time of Facebook

19 – Cultural Islam and Love in the Time of Facebook

Cultural Islam And Marriage

One of the biggest problems I see with Muslim marriages are forced marriages. This is when either the bride or groom (and it’s almost always the bride) is being forced, or pressured, by her family to marry someone she does not want to marry.

As I’ve mentioned in a previous article, there is a difference between an arranged marriage, and a forced marriage.

With an arranged marriage, the parents are guiding things, and they are playing an active role. However, the bride and groom should both agree and desire the marriage. Just because the marriage was partially planned and facilitated by the parents doesn’t mean they couple is being forced together.

However, a forced marriage is an arranged marriage on steroids.

Not only did the parents pick the other spouse, they’re also forcing, or pressuring, their child to go along with it even though there’s no love or attraction between the two.

This is when problems arise.

In this episode of the ILM Show, I discuss a few comments that people posted where their issues are all stemming from too much culture in their Islam.

The Problem Of Love Online

Another issue I see all too often is young people (and some not so young people) getting all wrapped up in love online. Especially that most obvious of culprits – Facebook.

And in this episode, we discuss a question/comment from two young Muslims who fall madly in love on Facebook.

And when guilt and faith force them to admit their transgression to the young lady’s parents, hoping for their blessing in marriage, they’re love is denied.

But the reason for denial was not because of Facebook (all they did was chat; there was no touching or making out according to the young man’s comment). The reason for denial was that the parents wanted their daughter to marry her cousin.

Cultural Islam Strike Again

If everything in the comment is the truth, then the young lady is already in love with the young man she met on Facebook. And if he had enough decency to admit this to the parents, and he is a good, practicing Muslim, and he is striving to make something of himself and ensure he can take care of a wife, there’s really no reason for the parents to turn him down.

They’re going to force their daughter into a relationship when her heart is attached to someone else.

This, my friends, is a recipe for disaster.

The parents really should take their daughter’s feelings into consideration and think of her as an individual who has emotions and hurts and desires like everyone else.

But I digress.

What can we do when Facebook and Cultural Islam collide and cause friction?

Show Notes

This episode is now available on the ILM Club. Click here to join.


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